I’m a bit behind on my writing because we had the busiest weekend we have had in a long time. Our Friday was the worst because we had so much to do w/things in our home and birthday gatherings Saturday & Sunday it was a complete chaos. I felt bad abandoning my doggies this whole weekend we usually take them wherever we go but this was different we couldn’t take them this time.
I think I got ahead of myself in thinking I could do a “Prayer Request” in my blog. I’m not ready, not by a long shot. This whole weekend proved that I haven’t changed like I thought I had. I’m too critical of people and say things that I shouldn’t and I only disappointed myself this weekend. I thought about writing this weekend but I didn’t know what to say because I was so ashamed of myself that I didn’t feel like I wanted to share my shame. I know God forgives us but there has to be a limit. I know He must be so disappointed in me as well & He must say “what more do you need Tri to change?”
Every time I’m around family I become this person I don’t like, I am doing my best to separate myself from them but we have a tight-knit family that when we don’t show up for family gatherings such as birthday dinners or birthday parties they get questionable as to “why didn’t you come” and there better be a good explanation. The holidays are coming up and I’m dreading them. I don’t know what to do because my loving husband loves being w/family both his and mine. How can I change if I can’t separate myself from them? Help please.