Day 41 Truly Thankful

     It is a good thing to give thanks unto the Lord…. Psalms 92:1

Remember  not just for today but for always, give thanks to God for He is good and His love endures forever!

Wow, here I am writing this and I’m amazed on what I went through the last few weeks to be here now giving Thanks to God, in the good times and in the those days that are not so good. I am grateful for day 41 and for the company of my Christian Bloggers who have stood by me when I was alone and afraid……to change.  The encouragement has been overwhelming but in the most positive way.

Happy Thanksgiving and May God Bless you

this day


Day 28 Helping to Heal, what if….

Prayer changes things

I’ve been thinking about this for a few days now and I guess I am looking for a validation from God when indeed God is probably waiting on me.  A few days ago I went through a few blogs and came across a woman that had been through a lot of pain in her life and she was so optimistic in her walk with Christ, I was very inspired.  In her blog she had a menu bar “prayer request” I thought about putting in my request for Emotional Healing and for God to open doors for me to go to school to become a writer but as I scrolled down the list it seemed almost infinite.  I didn’t think I was ever going to get to the bottom of that prayer request box and then I thought she has way to many to even notice my petty prayer request.  To my amazement she did, in fact she emailed me and called me her dear sister and that she would be praying for me, I thought, “wow, how is that possible?”

I remembered a sermon once & it was about something to the effect that when you help someone that is hurting more than you, your healing begins.  I don’t know just how true that is but a ministry has to start some place, right?

You know I don’t even know if I can help someone because I’m still an emotional mess and still have issues with anger and being critical of others so I don’t think I’m qualified.  But what if that’s the enemy telling me that so I don’t heal by helping someone?  What if I add a prayer request on my menu bar, does this make me a hypocrite, what if I write something on my blog that is not edifying to the seer’s, will I be judged, what if I sabotage this like I have everything else would that make me a bad person?  What if……..what if…….what if……. so many what if’s.

Please keep me in your prayers for God’s guidance on this because I wouldn’t know what to write to those seeking prayer, I don’t think I’m qualified just yet but I do know this is something I would love to eventually do.  In the meantime if you do need prayer let me know and I will go to God for your need(s). You’re in my prayers!

Day 15 Advice Needed

This is how I felt today, lol.

I woke very early this morning because I had a doctor’s appointment and a series of bad dreams, lol.  I have to tell you I dread going to the doctor’s, first of all, I’m there for hours and then when they do call me after all preliminaries; I’m in there waiting in a cold room for another 2 hours before the doctor comes in.  I’m bored out of my wits and I’m falling asleep and the walls are thin enough that I can hear him laughing and chatting away with his patient.  I guess I just don’t understand that if your appointment is at 10:30 a.m. why do I get out at 3:00 and to top it off my visit w/him was 25 minutes.  Sometimes I stay even later depending on the blood test he may want to check.  I have a pet peeve about this though, if I am over 15 minutes late they will cancel my appointment, been there done that.  This is the part where I need patience, I even use my phone to play a game or scroll through the internet because I bored and restless.  After the battery on my phone dies they only have 2 boring magazines in the exam room, this is funny but yet crazy.  Does anybody else go through this or is it just my doctor?  What’s your take on this?

Day 14 Uneasy dream

The darkness of a horrid dream

I had so much to do today with cleaning and washing clothes and it seemed like my day was never gonna end.  I was so exhausted but still had problems going to sleep.   I took over the counter p.m pills and nothing worked.  It must have been about 3 a.m before I finally dozed off.  I had the most bizarre dreams & I wanted to wake up from them but couldn’t.  I can’t explain it but they were like 5 different dreams rolled up in one and I felt like I was in an episode of the twilight zone…IN my dream.  I didn’t understand if it was a message to me or was it just because I was filled with stress earlier that day and my thoughts finally started to dwindle?  I didn’t like this dream and I wondered if this dream pertained as a message of the repercussion of my sins.  Did this mean my past sins or my present sins?  I was happy to be awake but I woke up with a tumultuous feeling, needless to say I began to pray.